Just as much as we are afraid of being responsible for the welfare of others, we are afraid of hurting ourselves. Self-preservation is a strong part of the decision not to help: we are afraid of witnessing something that we cannot erase from our memories, something we will be unable to “unsee”.
Imagine witnessing a car crash as you are waiting at a crosswalk on a busy road. The cars screech to a halt and there is silence. You and a few other strangers, also innocent bystanders, slowly approach the crushed vehicle. The feeling in your stomach, the thoughts racing in your head, are full of trepidation: what will you see if you open that driver’s door?
This may seem like a dramatic analogy, but it reflects the way that many of us have come to fear and avoid confrontation in our lives, however small.
But seems as though the COVID-19 pandemic has caused the world to look at our social environments with a new perspective. Accountability and caring about the well-being of others seems to be coming into fashion, so to speak.
So what is the Bystander Effect? Psychology Today explains:
“The bystander effect occurs when the presence of others discourages an individual from intervening in an emergency situation, against a bully, or during an assault or other crime. The greater the number of bystanders, the less likely it is for any one of them to provide help to a person in distress. People are more likely to take action in a crisis when there are few or no other witnesses present.”
So how can you avoid being a passive bystander?
“Don’t expect others to be the first to act in a crisis—just saying “Stop” or “Help is on the way” can prevent further harm. Speak up using a calm, firm tone. Give others directions to get them involved in helping too. Do your best to ensure the safety of the victim, and don’t be afraid to seek assistance when you need it.”
Think about how this can be applied to so many social situations that you may have found yourself witness to, or directly involved. What can you do better next time to squash your inner Bystander?
